Portrait in twenty-five seconds. Go.

He’s a bit like tofu isn’t he?

Soft and beige, with a perfectly even consistency all the way through that makes him a bit Fun to cut into little cubes.

His big secret: He’ll take on the flavour, somewhat, of whatever you soak him in.

Salty, or sweet, or hot, too hot for the tip of the tongue even.

Yet he’s just bright enough to know,

dread,

that sooner or later, someone will say,

“Wow, the sauce is fantastic, but still… it’s really just soybeans y’know?”