Be free! Be heavy!

My bike is ridiculously light. It’s but a few feet of Reynolds 631, a handful of spokes, some little aluminum thingys, a bit of rubber, and a patch of a cows arse. Very minimal, very svelte, and right around the good sense barrier. If it was any lighter, it would be like riding a frightened dog around.

Yet, I see the Spandies, and they’re using as much cash as they can spare to shave a few grams. It’s like a bad coke habit, a lot more money to get just the tiniest bit higher. They worry so about what the heaviest part of their bike is…

Me? I know damn well what the heaviest part of my bike is. The rider. I in fact account for around 85% of the rolling mass.

Do you know what those carbon-fibre track bikes weigh? Less than nothing, they in fact have to be magnetically treated so as not to float off into space. Yet the guy I saw sitting on a Pista Concept earlier today hoed into a McHelltolifewich as if an orphan would be skinned and rolled in salt if he didn’t get it all in three bites.

Listen: I like skinny everything as much as the next guy. Maybe I’ve counted my skid patches. Maybe I’ve even ordered a Campy brake. But this weight weenie shit has to stop.

I set a Bleriot on the scale the other day, and guess what? Thirty goddamned pounds! But I could throw it as well as my own ride, which weighs just over half that. I even skip-stopped it, and nailed a lovely pedalhop. Furthermore, anyone ever weigh NJS shit? Guess what, it’s all very tubby. That’s why Keirin bikes don’t fucking spontaneously disintegrate like TT bikes do.

So let’s all get together, and stop the madness.

Next set of bars I buy, will be cro-mo. Suck that.

-m (マーく）